... that this will be applied to flatulence or just wanting to recline the seat.
Flight Attendant, "Sir/Ma'am, our methane detector has registered flatus gases emanating from you. Would you like to pay cash or put this on a credit card? Our fee is US$12.75 plus state tax for the state we are currently over. We do not take personal checks. Please hurry as the air around you is difficult to breathe."
Flight Attendant, "Sir/Ma'am, our seat inclination detector has registered that your seat is inclined at 15 degrees. Would you like to pay cash or put this on a credit card? Our fee is US$19.99 for each 5-degree increment of inclination, plus state tax for the state we are currently over. We do not take personal checks."
Ok, once again we're thinking negatively. It's been proven that we can run cars on biological waste so, instead, shouldn't we be harnessing that power to fly these planes? Retrofit seats with fart inhalers so that it sucks the fart air into a processing module that will convert it into energy to fuel the jet. Then, you can actually pay people as they exit the flight for whatever gas they contributed to the trip [img]/images/graemlins/smile.gif[/img]
It seems to me that the airlines should pay you for taking those exit seats. After all, you're the one who will be doing the work of lifting that 40lb plus door and then getting trampled by the on-rushing multitude who think their worthless lives are worth saving over all the others.
Jim, A small issue with your examples: most airlines no longer take cash for in-flight services, credit cards only now.
I flew to Indiana last week to attend my Brother's funeral. I used Air Tran and was impressed by their efficiency and service. Before boarding it was announced that no one would be allowed to take any peanuts onboard as someone had said that they were deathly allergic to them. I didn't see an elephant sniffing us as we boarded however. I was tempted to tell them that I was suffering from a terrible dependency on peanuts and I would convulse and perhaps expire if I didn't have some every 15 minutes. Just to see what they would do. But, I chickened out. Maybe next time.
Thanks Jim. I came from a family of 8. I'm the soul remaining sibling. We were all adopted out when I was 14 months old. But I found them all and brought the remaining ones together when I was around 34yrs old. I only wish I had known them sooner.
I'll try that suggestion next time I fly. Will you bail me out?